Do you guys ever feel like you let the thing you love define your life just a little too much?
While being mostly out of commission for running these past couple weeks, I’ve been doing a lot of thinking about running and not running and why I love it so much. I thought about what I was like when I first started running (200+ pounds, unfit, unhappy) and how far I’ve come since then. I realized that slowly, I have let running become one of the single things that defines me. Hi, I’m Chelsea, I’m a runner, nice to meet you. The descriptive part of that sentence should really have a lot more adjectives, shouldn’t it?
Running started as a way to lose weight. It then became something that I did for fun, because it made me happy. Somewhere along the way I let it transition into the most important thing in my life. So when I spoke, it was mostly about running; when I planned, it was around running; when I ate, it was with my next run in mind; when I rested, it was so I could run farther next time.
When I missed a run, or like recently, had to miss several runs, I felt unreasonably upset. Sure, missing a run stinks. Training is important. But I let it get to the point that when something kept me from running, I let it bring down all aspects of my life. Suddenly I didn’t love myself as much. I wasn’t significant anymore. How ridiculous is that? I took a good thing in my life and made it the ultimate thing, to a point where I based how I felt that day around whether or not I had a good run.
This time off has helped me to bring some balance back into my life. There are definitely people in this world that can dedicate most of their time and energy or even their entire lives to a sport. They’re amazing athletes and I so admire them; but I am not one of them.
Hi, my name is Chelsea, I’m a wife, a sister, a daughter, a friend, a coach, an artist, a pretty awesome cook, and I run too.
I have my first physical therapy session tonight. I can’t wait to get back to pounding the pavement, with a little more perspective this time.